My Mattress Buying Nightmare: A Cautionary Bedtime Tale

Let me start off with a disclaimer: If you haven't purchased a new mattress recently, this post will probably be of little interest.  However, if you've just bought a mattress — or plan to buy one soon — keep reading.  I think you will be able to relate only too well to my story.

Until a few months ago, the word "mattress" was barely even in my vocabulary.      I had been sleeping on an ancient, 25-year-old hand-me-down mattress.  True, it was getting a bit lumpy.  And once in a while,  I would feel an ancient spring pushing through.  But it was my bed and I was perfectly content to sleep in it. 

My significant other, however, hated the mattress.  He started issuing ultimatums, threatening, "It's the mattress or me."  In retrospect, I should have said, "The mattress stays. You can go." But it's too late for that now.  Far too late.

So began our Mattress Buying Adventure in Hell.

Our story started out in the usual way; with us traipsing around from store to store, trying out beds.  We went to department stores.  We went to chain stores.  We went to small, independent stores.  And like all new mattress shoppers, we quickly learned that the system is rigged.  The mattress retailers are out to deliberately deceive and confuse you.  And no matter how clever you think you are at this mattress game, you won't outsmart them. Trust me, they are going to win.  And one way or another, you are going to part with a lot of money (ca-ching! ca-ching!)

First, as every mattress shopper knows, the industry makes it almost impossible to comparison shop.  Every store has their own models, with their own different, exclusive names.  Say you like a Serta "Perfect Day/Taurus" at one store.  When you go to a different store, you won't find the same bed.  Or, you'll find it under the Serta "Trump Home Collection" (yes, Donald Trump has his own brand of mattresses...ick).  Or something like it.  Or not very much like it at all.  Or they will tell you that particular bed was last year's model and is no longer available.  Even though you just saw that bed at another store fifteen minutes ago.               The confusion goes on and on.  It's maddening.  Intentionally so.

Then there are the return policies.  When it comes to buying a mattress, the store's return policy matters.  A lot.  Some stores have a 60-day return/exchange policy.  Some have a 100-day policy.  Some allow no returns or exchanges at all.  Which is a problem.  Because the fact is, when you buy a new mattress, you really don't know if you are going to like it until you've slept on it for about a month or two.  You have to "break it in".  Of course, by then, the entire experience may have broken your spirit and made you question your will to live…or at least your need for sleep.  But I'm getting ahead of myself.  Back to the shopping...

A few words about the mattress stores.  You know those big mattress retailers who advertise a sale virtually every day of the year?  Here in San Francisco, we have several of those stores all lined up on one block.  I call it “Mattress Death Row”.     I have made numerous visits to every one of these  fluorescent-lit emporiums of pain, and I now dread stepping inside their doors.  The signs on their doors should say, “Abandon Hope All Ye Who Enter Here…And Abandon Your Wallets While You’re At It”.

Mattress salespeople are frequently compared to used car salesmen.  I think this is unfair to used car salesmen.  At some mattress chain stores, the sales staff practically ooze sleaze. You walk in and encounter a sales guy, perched like a vulture, ready to swoop down on his innocent prey and point him or her towards the priciest, top of the line Serta, Sealy or Simmons (the “S-brands”).  These mattress-peddling predators can barely disguise their contempt for the customers.  That contempt is only surpassed by the air of self-loathing that surrounds this breed.  They hate their jobs.  And I don’t blame them.

In other stores, however, I have to admit the sales people were quite friendly, low-pressure, and infinitely patient.  And believe me, they need patience.  At one such store, which I now fondly refer to as “SleepTrainWreck” , a young sales guy looked on for over an hour as my boyfriend and I ran back and forth between assorted Sertas and Sealys, arguing  over which mattress to buy.  I actually thought we would break up in that store.  But we didn't.  Instead, we were so worn down by the process, and so desperate to make a decision and get the hell out of there, we finally bought a mattress:  A Stearns and Foster "Governor's Palace Euro Pillowtop” that cost about twice as much as we intended to pay (ca-ching! ca-ching!).  The weary sales guy threw in some free pillows to sweeten the deal (more about those pillows later).

Now, you may ask, what was so difficult about choosing a mattress?  An innocent enough question.  But if you have to ask, then you haven't bought a mattress lately.

Once upon a time, buying a mattress was simple.  You chose from "Soft", "Medium" or "Firm".  There were coils inside, and probably some cotton or horse hair, covered with thin (cool) cotton ticking.  Sadly, those days are gone.  Today’s mattresses are overly complicated, gimmick-laden slabs, filled with a host of mysterious, mostly synthetic materials that don't breathe.  There are wrapped coils.  There are unwrapped coils.  There are  individual coils.  There are no coils.  And there are endless, conflicting opinions on which one is best.

As for the materials, all the big name manufacturers use a combination of either Latex , Memory Foam, or some other generic foam.  Memory Foam is notorious for "sleeping warm".  So if you "sleep warm", like I do, you have to avoid it like the plague.  Latex is supposed to be cooler, but the jury is still out on that.  Plus, there are many different types of Latex.  Are you getting tired?  Me too.  I now know more about this topic than I ever cared to know.  Let's just say: it's complicated.  And, the fact is, you can try out the bed for hours in the store.  But you don't really know how you are going to like your new mattress until it's home and broken in.  As one blogger on a mattress forum so aptly put it, a mattress is "the one big ticket item where parts are concealed and enigmatic."  In other words: Buyer, beware. 

The new mattresses are also bigger than before.  Much bigger.  In fact, they are now behemoths.  I have no idea why people like these huge, heavy beds.  I even read that interior decorators loathe them. http://www.nytimes.com/1999/04/15/garden/the-new-beds-a-step-or-two-up.html?pagewanted=all&src=pm

But apparently, there is a huge market for huge beds.  Supposedly, a lot of women like them because they make them "feel like princesses".  I don't get it.  But there are so many things I don't get.

We knew our new bed would be higher than the old bed.  So we purchased the "mini" box springs.   Nothing, however, could have prepared me for the day the new bed arrived.  An enormous delivery truck pulled up, and I watched in horror as three deliverymen wrestled the new, behemoth (king) mattress out of the truck, and up three flights of stairs.  When they took away my old bed, I practically cried.  When they put the new mattress onto the frame, I practically went into shock.  It was gigantic.  The bed now resembled a huge, mile-high throne in the middle of the bedroom.  It dwarfed everything else in the room.  When I climbed up onto the bed (which took considerable effort), I was suddenly peering down on a bird's eye view of my bedside table. I didn’t feel like a princess.  I felt more like Gulliver.

Before we could even judge how we liked the comfort of the bed, the "mini" box springs had to be changed out for even mini-er box springs.  That meant another trip to SleepTrainWreck, another separate purchase so as not to forfeit our one mattress return allowance (ca-ching! ca-ching!), and yet another delivery.

Once we had lowered the mattress to a reasonable, human height, we quickly realized that the "pillowtop" made the mattress very mushy.  We'd sink in so deep, we started calling it "The Mosh Pit".  It was also much too warm.  The fault of the pillowtop?  The latex mattress?  Impossible to say.  But we were sweating and needed to do something.

I had seen ads for a "cooling mattress pad" made with "NASA Outlast technology".  I immediately ordered one (ca-ching! ca-ching!).  The day the pad arrived, it had such a strong chemical smell, we had to launder it right away.     The directions said it was ok to put it in the washer and drier.  So we did.            On Low.   The mattress pad disintegrated in the drier.  It just completely melted.  The Cooling Mattress folks apologized profusely and sent us a replacement pad.     We are still using it.  But honestly, it isn't any cooler than any other pad.  So much for NASA technology. 

Bottom line, after several months of trying to adjust to The Mosh Pit, we knew it had to go.

Thus began another endless round of shopping, researching, and lying on countless beds in countless stores.  It was clear that every mattress came with a trade-off.  The mattress would have some type of "cooling construction" -- great! -- but it would be too firm.  Or it would be just the right softness, but have too much Memory Foam.  Or the store wouldn't allow any returns. Or...the list went on and on.  At one point, we were tempted to buy an old-fashioned, cotton/coil mattress from a well-known local manufacturer.  We could have had one -- for about the price of a new car.  So it was back to the evil "S"-brands with their polyurethanes, foams and scary list of unknowns.

It was discouraging and exhausting.  But…I wasn't alone.  I soon discovered that the Internet is crawling with other miserable mattress owners/shoppers, all complaining bitterly about their new mattresses.  The mother of all these sites is an industry-sponsored site called "What's the Best Mattress", http://www.whatsthebest-mattress.com/login.php?err=post&ref=%2Fforum%2Fpost.php%3Fp%3D19276&refn=

This website became my go-to resource and support group all in one.  Log on, and you enter a world of hurt.  There are literally hundreds of comments from people complaining about every possible make and model of mattress.  There are disgruntled pillowtop owners.  People complaining about collapsed mattresses.  Or mattresses that “outgas” chemical fumes.  Or that hurt their backs, shoulders or necks.  Others complain about an uncomfortable phenomenon called "Latex Pushback".  There are even people offering advice on how to perform "mattress surgery".  Yes, you heard that right.  These folks will tell you in agonizing detail how to cut open your brand new mattress to either remove or add your own fillers.  It's unreal.  I mean...doesn't the industry know we HATE their products?

In the end, we finally settled on a Simmons Beauty Rest “Pemberton Plush” (mattress names are clearly designed to make the buyers feel like royalty, instead of poor, sleepless schmucks who had to take out a loan to purchase a damn bed).  The new mattress arrived this week, and so far, it feels very comfy.  However, to my dismay, it also feels…very warm.  But I won’t go there (not yet).

We returned the The Mosh Pit to SleepTrainWreck.  They gladly refunded our money, or at least part of it.  First, they deducted for the old box springs we had already returned (ca-ching! ca-ching!).  Oh, and remember those "free" pillows?  Well, we had to pay for those, too...or return them after months of use (ca-ching! ca-ching! ca-ching!). 

Like I said, you can't win at this game.

 

 

 

 

Comments

[Jacob S.]

Marcie,
I found your blog while doing some (purely unscientific) research on mattress retailers and negative mattress buying situations. Was there any particular thing that stood out as a positive during your mattress purchase(s)? Is there something in particular you would have liked to have heard (from a salesperson) or known on the front end that you didn't?

Thanks and good luck with your Simmons.

Jacob

[Rob Hatfield]

Marcie,
Glad to see you back. Very funny story. And so universally true. After buying three of the "last mattress you'll ever buy" only to throw them out after 4 or 5 years, I bought an air bed (like a sleep number bed, but much cheaper from a chain store called "Denver Mattress"--I think.) It was about the same as a good "S" brand, but the clincher was 5 years-same-as-cash financing. It works like a charm and with separate controls, the little woman and I can choose our support level. My only regret: we bought the "pillow-top" model. And as you will learn, the "plush" or "pillow-top" is the first thing to get lumpy and uncomfortable. But I never thought about surgery...

[Bill Shields]

I think that I would also hate buying a really thin (http://www.meublesloren.com/en/) mattress too. Or if it came with bugs, that would basically scare me tons. I hate bugs.

[Amerisleep high quality memory foam mattresses]

Glad to see you back. Very funny story. And so universally true. After buying three of the "last mattress you'll ever buy" only to throw them out after 4 or 5 years, I bought an air bed (like a sleep number bed, but much cheaper from a chain store called "Denver Mattress"--I think.) It was about the same as a good "S" brand, but the clincher was 5 years-same-as-cash financing. It works like a charm and with separate controls, the little woman and I can choose our support level. My only regret: we bought the "pillow-top" model. And as you will learn, the "plush" or "pillow-top" is the first thing to get lumpy and uncomfortable. But I never thought about surgery...

[Leona James]

Thumbs up guys your doing a really good job.
http://cookingrecipetips.com/

[Hastens bedden]

Very much enjoyed your story, I bought lately a matress but luckily mine was good the first time and i still sleep very well on it after 8 years.

[Beddenwinkels]

Very funny story enjoyed it very much. Really like your writing style, keep up the good blogging!

[Hastens bedden]

I really enjoyed reading your blog!

[puppetmaster...]

I have been in the mattress business for over 25 years, and know the business inside and out. The mistake most people making when buying a mattress is that did not think it thru before the they go out shopping. First thing to realize is that a mattress gets a little softer over time. So no matter how it feels in the store it will in fact get a lot softer as time goes by. There is no mattress made that will not continually get softer and softer. That is way most people end up replacing there mattress, it has gotten soft or has started sagging in the middle. So when buying a mattress look for one that is harder then you like. Then go and buy mattress pads or toppers, to soften it up to get the feel you like. Spend less money on the mattress and more on the linens. If you do it this way your mattress will last a very long time It is much more cost effective way to do it in the long run. Also the next time you need a mattress don't just stop at the first store with air dancer waving you in for the big sale, and think you will get a great deal. The trick to getting a good price on a mattress is to buy them in the summer when mattress stores are in there slow season. That is when they will give you the very best price. http://www.supersignfactory.com/

[EmmaCay]

Thanks for sharing. I'm looking for a mattress in Ottawa. I would really like to know more about shopping for the right one. I need something for my bad back. http://www.bedzzz.ca/our-history

[fostering allowance]

I always enjoy to read your post, because its really enjoyable for me.
fostering allowance

[Mujgan]

Dear Ms Judelson,
Your post is marvelous in one word! Having bought a new mattress just two days ago, I can relate to your every sentence. I woke up both nights missing my 19-year old worn loyal mattress...
Best regards from Ankara, Turkey

[Marcie Judelson]

Thanks, Mujgan! (How on earth did you find my blog?).

Good luck with your new mattress. I hope you can adjust.

[Mujgan]

I'm so glad I discovered your blog while googling about mattresses, because you can't imagine how much you helped me beat my mattress blues! By the way, your posts about valley nation and journeys are also hilarious.

Looking forward to your next posts,

Your fan in Turkey
Mujgan

[Auping Boxsprings]

Haha, I like your style blogging and I think a lot of people agree with you about the hell of bed shopping. In Holland we do not have that many stores and the retailers are working together (if we do not have a certain mattress we will aks other retailers if they have the bed in stock). Haha, you can also come to Holland next time! ;-)

[Carol Z]

Holy crow, truer words have never been written! It's like you read my mind. After 19 years, hubby and I decided to replace our California King mattress. After much agonizing (and nearly divorce), we decided, like you, on a Simmons Beauty Rest. It was delivered yesterday and last night was the worst night's sleep I've had in 19 years. I'm keeping my fingers crossed it will get better. We've only got 14 days to exchange it if we need to.

[Marcie Judelson]

Hi Carol,

Sorry to hear about your mattress travails.
But why do you only have 2 weeks to return it?
That is outrageous. Most of the major retailers allow 2-3 months to return a mattress.

All I can tell you is it took me some time to adjust to our new mattress (both of our new mattresses), but I eventually did adjust.
So don't give up -- it could get better.
Hope so!

[Aq8]

I bought a superfirm Big S mattress set back in 1996, no hideously ugly and heat-stroke-inducing stupid pillowtop. It was a little on the tall side, but not terribly. As in, I don't have to jump to get on the bed.

I paid huge money, $1200--ON SALE (I looked for the cheapest price on this one), and it has definitely been worth every penny I paid. We spend 1/3 of your life on these things, so it's really the last thing we need to cheap out on.

Anyway, I'm still using it. It hasn't gotten all that much softer, it's not sagging in the middle. So very happy with this investment

I want to get another of these mattresses for another room, but it's impossible to find one like it these days. When I go shopping, it's all disgusting pillow-tops (I'm in South Texas--Pillow tops are HEAT TORTURE). Or they have vomit-inducing smells, or make me feel like I'm lying in mush. Or sometimes ALL of these things are going on.

I hate them. All of them.

The clerks hate me, because I've stopped letting them vomit their spiel at me. I tell them I want no-pillow top, I want quality, I want super-firmness (because, as the mattress guy upthread pointed out, these things will soften up over the years). I'm willing to pay a good price, but not my future grandchildren's arms and legs!

A halfway-decent mattress just isn't out there anymore, so I'll keep my 1996 set until I absolutely can't.

If I'd only known back then just how good my set was...

[Marita Chambers]

I bought a luxury firm mattress two days ago and it is very uncomfortable. When I tried it in the store it didn't feel so hard ,but after being on it for only part of one night I had to sleep in one of my other bedrooms.After checking my receipt for the store' return policy it states that mattresses and box springs must have law tags attached and be in original sealed factory wrapping,but when the men delivered it they did not ask me about the wrapping, but just automatically took it out of the plastic. I am totally disgusted and don't know what to do. Thanks for listening.

[Anice King]

When I got married my Husband and I went shopping for a Mattress,we went to Sears and that mattress lasted over 25 years.We decided to buy another one several years ago and that was so high you needed a step stool to get into bed terrible. Now I have been looking to down size from a queen to a Full as I don't have the space for a queen. Well I have been looking around,what a chore,I think I would rather buy a car than a mattress. I do know more about cars . I also think that you can do to much research . My experience is that Sears are pretty reliable and will go back there ,as there prices are good and you don't get the high pressure like you do at other stores.

[Steve]

It sounds like I might be one of the few satisfied customers who recently bought a bed. I like this author also went to sleep train, however my experience was very different. I have had chronic back pain for years and after years of trying numerous types of physical therapy, pain pills, weight lifting for strengthening among a few other things I finally decided that it was my bed that was causing my back pain.

Like a majority of Americans my bed was a cheap hand me down. When I went to sleep train I found my sales person to be very helpful. He very clearly explained all the differences between mattress coils in all the new beds and the bed I currently owned. I decided on a simmons beauty rest because I think they have the best coil quality.

my bed has a memory foam topper but I will admit I have never really felt "too warm" because of it but if I did I would probably just turn a fan on.

I have loved my bed. My new bed is bigger and softer than old bed but I have never laid on something so comfortable in my entire life. I don't mind that its thicker and sits higher than my old one. To get that worked up about something like that as the author did in this article is a little petty. All the new frills about a bed have worked for me and what my body needs.

and finally the best news... After 8 years of chronic back pain my new bad was so comfortable so much more supportive that I sleep flat on my back all night and never really shift. My back pain has pretty much gone away.

buying a fancy new bed was the best thing I've done in years.

my bed was certainly expensive, but I think the quality of beds has gone up. Bed companies are fighting hard to improve their products get a leg up in the market place to give the best bed. I don't think that is a reason to complain. I don't know how anyone is going to argue that beds are lower quality today than they were 30 years ago. Learning all your options is more work but its ultimately to your benefit. I am quite happy to pay as long as what I'm buying is great quality and improves my sleep.

[Sandy Terry]

I found your blog very amusing because I just went through the same thing. I WOULD rather buy a car than a mattress. I had to keep it for 21 days before I was allowed to return it and my husband and myself were counting down the days. Choosing a second one was making me very nervous because we were only allowed one exchange(even though we bought the required 80.00 mattress cover). I am not much happier with this one and looks like we are stuck with it. And did I mention we were charged a restocking fee of 50.00 for returning the first one? When I called the manager of the store, he suggested maybe to use two mattress covers or an egg crate topper. I can't imagine having to put a topper on a brand new pillow top that he told me was a wonderful choice.( but will if it might help) The mattress slopes down from the edge of the bed to my body and I sink into it so far, it feels like I am stuck in a hole. I weigh 110 pounds and my husband 190 lbs. My sister also just bought one a new (different one) at a different store and has the same problem. So like you, I did not find it a very enjoyable experience and still ended up unhappy.

[Marcie Judelson]

Sandy - Sorry to hear your tale of woe.

Like I always say, any day I don't have to shop for a new mattress is a good day.

Just seeing the mattress commercials on tv gives me the willies.

Good luck!

[Canadian reputation management]

Wow, this piece of writing is good, my sister is analyzing such things, soo I am going to inform her.

[mattresses]

I am sure this paragraph has touched all the internet users, its really really pleasant piece of writing on building up new webpage.